KH FST: Another Word For...
Dec. 21st, 2011 11:31 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
way2dawnThis is a Riku/Roxas FST and the soundtrack to Memory's Skyscraper: August. Quotes from the fic will be in song explanations, so please read the fic first if you don't want to be spoiled.
download zip here
Another Word For...
1. A Little Less Conversation (JXL Remix) - Elvis Presley
A little less conversation, a little more action please
All this aggravation ain't satisfactioning me
A little more bite and a little less bark
A little less fight and a little more spark
Close your mouth and open up your heart and baby satisfy me
Satisfy me baby
Come on baby I'm tired of talking
Grab your coat and let's start walking
The tentative truce from before, tacit agreement to eliminate the surrounding Heartless at the base of the building, vanished without a trace as the last Heartless fell, and his opponent’s white, deadly weapon is pointed at him now. It’s only due to Riku catching a Strike Raid in midair that it’s not two of those Keyblades attacking him now, but he doesn’t have much time to ponder the black Keyblade he now wields in his hand before he’s forced to defend himself with it against another flurry of attacks.
---
“Why? Why do you have the Keyblade?” If what Naminé told him is right, and it feels right, the only person other than King Mickey that’s supposed to have one is unable to use it and the reason he’s here, fighting. This boy is supposed to be a Nobody, right? So how is it possible?
“Shut up!” The still-hooded boy says harshly, readying his blade for another attack.
2. Supermassive Black Hole - Muse
Ooh, baby, don't you know I suffer?
Ooh, baby, can you hear me moan?
You caught me under false pretences
How long before you let me go?
Ooh ooh ahh, you set my soul alight
I thought I was a fool for no one
But ooh, baby, I'm a fool for you
Oathkeeper changes pointedly into Oblivion and swings deftly one last time, for what the blond boy seems to expect to be the finishing blow, but in a wild, desperate motion – and if Riku was anyone but himself he really would be dead – he catches it by the shaft and tries to wrench it out of the other’s grasp.
The other boy doesn’t seem like he’s going to let go, though, and it appears to be a terrible miscalculation for a moment, before the boy pitches forwards and crashes into Riku, Keyblade dropped in surprise and vanishing from both of their grips. The force of the impact makes Riku’s covered turquoise eyes blink hard once, then open wider than he thought was possible as he stares into the bright coldness of the other boy’s equally shocked blue eyes inches from his own.
3. Another Word For Desperate - Straylight Run
And all the awkward ways
that you recoil
when I get close
And oh, the awful grin
that greets me when
I know I'm wrong
So down on hands and knees,
choking, gasping, dripping spit
I just can't make good
on any of these promises
Then he asked me,
"what does that mean?"
What's another word for desperate?
Repetition makes an impression
What's another word for desperate?
I won't be around here
for too very long
“Sora,” he says again, not caring that he’s also slammed against the shelf again, strangely thrilled to see the anger in those eyes flare up once more.
---
“You’re so pathetic, Riku.”
“What-” and that word really is said with a gasp, “-what’s that supposed to mean?” He’s not pathetic. He’s not.
---
“I can’t,” he protests, “that’s impossible.”
“Of course it isn’t,” Roxas scoffs, reaching to remove the blindfold himself. Riku attempts to twist away, but Roxas has made very sure not to let him be able to move. The other boy starts to press closer to him once more, fingers playing with the edges of the blindfold.
“Don’t let a monster out if you’re not prepared to fight it,” Riku warns, turning his head away, and he’s uncomfortable again, having this boy talking about his blindfold.
“Monster, Riku?” Roxas laughs, and not very pleasantly, either. “You’re just a lost little boy who doesn’t know what he wants.”
4. Just Tonight... - Jimmy Eat World
I was scared but once I thought about, I let it go
Everything she said to me I guess I ought to know
We're all tired talk when it comes to shove
Put up put out or stay at home
We'll never be the same
Never feel this way again
I'd give you everything but you want pain
A little water please
I taste you all over my teeth
Never again
Just tonight?
Okay.
All at once the music stopped
The feeling ran away
An ugly picture of me and you
But nothing I can change
You know what happens when the light's back on
The less you know the more you want
And you want
You want
“Masochist,” Roxas smirks triumphantly. Riku’s too busy panting and oh god-ing to really argue at this point, so he just settles for letting Roxas shove his tongue down his throat again.
---
“Sora,” he breathes into Roxas’s hair, in an almost-whisper like the first time he said it here, and as Roxas starts and pushes away from him, it’s still the wrong thing to say.
5. What Do You Need? - Goo Goo Dolls
What do you need from me tonight?
I feel you look right through me now
I can't pretend it's alright
Maybe we'll find a way somehow
Why do you need to turn it on?
Why does it always feel so wrong?
What do you need from me tonight?
The truth is so complicated now
You feel so free to say
You're wrong
Fear makes you fragile darling
Hate is so heavy when you're weak
Now we're both lost in anger
When we're alone we'll find some peace
“Is that really what you’ve been thinking this whole time?” Roxas demands, at once offended and furious.
“Wait, So-” He was going to say Sora again, damn his mouth, and Roxas’s eyes flashing tell him that the other boy knows it. Riku doesn’t even remember anything about what Sora’s like.
“Did you think that if you let me fuck you, that I’d suddenly turn into him?”
6. Stupid - Sarah McLachlan
Night, lift up the shades
Let in the the brilliant light of morning
But steady there now
For I am weak and starving for mercy
Sleep has left me alone
To carry the weight of unraveling where we went wrong
It's all I can do to hang on
To keep me from falling into old familiar shoes
How stupid could I be?
A simpleton could see
That you're no good for me
But you're the only one I see
Love has made me a fool
Set me on fire and watched as I floundered
Unable to speak
Except to cry out
And wait for your answer
But you come around in your time
Speaking of fabulous places
Create an oasis
Dries up as soon as you're gone
Like he really expected a Nobody – even Sora’s Nobody – to feel anything, to do anything different. So stupid.
7. Sweetness - Jimmy Eat World
String from your tether unwinds
Up and outward to bind
So tell me what do I need
When words lose their meaning
I was spinning free
With a little sweet and simple numbing me
Stumble till you crawl
Sinking into sweet uncertainty
What a dizzy dance
The sweetness will not be concerned with me
And Riku doesn’t really have a good reason for why he’s approaching Roxas like this, even after the Nobody made his opinion of Riku quite clear, but he just can’t seem to put the blond boy back into whatever mental box he started out in – not after what happened in the supermarket – even if he wanted to.
8. Casey - Darren Hayes
And we're all alone, and so tired of being underrated
So don't take me home 'cause I feel alive when you come and save me
A yellow car speeding down a south-side freeway
we'll rewrite this movie
make it end like we want it to
And Casey, when you go,
can you come and find me?
I wanna be beside you when you leave this town
I'll be waving goodbye
pretending not to cry
I wanna be someone
If you take me away, all the pain will change into a memory
of when we were amazing
1989, summer had hit but it was not moving
What is it with this town?
Every time we win, it just feels like losing
We were never gonna fit in
I was a mixed-up kid and you were my sanity
“Roxas,” he says, simply, and the violence is gone. A moment before, Roxas looked like he maybe wanted to fight him again, but now… Roxas is looking at him now like Riku’s real. With such an abrupt change in demeanor, Riku wonders how badly Roxas wants to be real, or if he thinks that Riku saying his name will make him more real.
9. Artificial Sweetner - No Doubt
Oh yes I'm guilty
For leasing myself out
Not ready to go up for sale
Can't seem to give it up
Stubborn, so selfish
I'm showing off the worst in me
I'm full of artificial sweetener
My heart's been deceitful
It's all artificial sweetener
I'm faking I love you's
You're forcing me to
You really deserve love
I want to love you
But I can't seem to find myself
“But I- that’s not,” there’s a gasp for breath, “possible, why would you-” Roxas cuts himself off, eyes wide and almost bewildered-looking. Then, quieter and a thousand times more anxious, “I don’t understand.”
10. Bullets - Augustana
Come fly down
Like a singing bird
Sings your name
I am still the same
Black and white
No, you're not to blame
Unless we
Put me down to shame
Lights in the car in the park
Falling on my face
I know who we are
I'm looking down for the rest of the night
Bullet in my head ended late last night
Jack and coke
Please take off your coat
Come and smile
Please stay here awhile
Almost immediately after they get inside, Roxas shoves him against the wall of the cubicle, and Riku pulls Roxas closer to him when the blond puts his tongue back in Riku’s mouth. They’d tried doing things more slowly last time, but it’s more comfortable for both of them like this.
11. Between - Vienna Teng
We are not together here
Though we lie entwined
To make room for the other presence
We both draw back in our minds
I have a prophecy
Threatening to spill into words
This growing certainty
Of Over
There once was a time I was sure of the bond
When my hands and my tongue and my thoughts were enough
We are the same but our lives move along
And the third one between
Replaces what once was love
Freedom is being alone
I fear liberation
But something more alive than silence swallows conversation
No pleasaing drama in subtle averted eyes
The swelling fermata as the chord dies<
“Next time is the last time,” Roxas says, Riku’s arms wrapped around him.
“Yeah,” Riku agrees. This delay, this… he doesn’t know what to call it – Riku can barely put Roxas into words anymore, let alone categories – can’t go on any longer. Sora’s waiting to be woken up.
12. Papa - Vanessa Carlton
Look up
look where you wanna be
look left
look where you left me
I shoulda known by the ice in his eyes
but you warmed me up with your 'so sweet' demise
and nestled in your calculated moonshine
boy you give good
love, plastic love
you're a genuine wannabe
and you got it all up your blue sleeve, your sleeve
Roxas falls to the ground. I didn’t want to, at first, but…
In a voice both foreign and far too familiar, “I’ve accepted it.” Riku’s won. It still feels like a betrayal.
13. Ain't That Unusual - Goo Goo Dolls
Could you talk to me
Honestly?
'Cause I never heard a word you said now
And I ain't just being mean
'Cause all we are is what we're told
And most of that's been lies
It's like a made for TV movie
And I just blew my lines
Someday you never made it
And maybe you never will
Hey, you never made it
Ain't that unusual
Now I feel unknown
And it's safe that way
Are you too bored to care
Or too dumb to be scared?
Now what's that supposed to mean?
I'm burnt out on some empty reasons
Another waste of time
There's something that I wish I'd said
But I don't think it'd rhyme
Sorry I put them words in your mouth
But you wouldn't talk to me
Everything I want, I haven't got
Sick of everything I'm not
Put my heavy coat on for a while
It's freezing in the corner of my mind
“You’re the one who’s losing right now,” The blond retorts, then stops abruptly and puts a hand to his mouth like he didn’t think it was possible for him to respond that way.
---
“Goodbye,” Riku says, smiling for a fraction of a second. I’m sorry, he wants to say, but the words get stuck in his throat.
---
And then, with a yell, the change begins. Distantly, Riku hears the metal sounds of Roxas’s Keyblades sliding past one another. Does Roxas even know what’s happening? Does he just not care?
---
DiZ is the one, he thinks, that doesn’t understand things. Bending down to lift the unconscious boy into his arms, deliberately restraining himself from brushing the hair away from Roxas’s face, Riku follows DiZ back to Twilight Town.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I'd be glad to hear what you guys think of this :)
download zip here
Another Word For...
1. A Little Less Conversation (JXL Remix) - Elvis Presley
A little less conversation, a little more action please
All this aggravation ain't satisfactioning me
A little more bite and a little less bark
A little less fight and a little more spark
Close your mouth and open up your heart and baby satisfy me
Satisfy me baby
Come on baby I'm tired of talking
Grab your coat and let's start walking
The tentative truce from before, tacit agreement to eliminate the surrounding Heartless at the base of the building, vanished without a trace as the last Heartless fell, and his opponent’s white, deadly weapon is pointed at him now. It’s only due to Riku catching a Strike Raid in midair that it’s not two of those Keyblades attacking him now, but he doesn’t have much time to ponder the black Keyblade he now wields in his hand before he’s forced to defend himself with it against another flurry of attacks.
---
“Why? Why do you have the Keyblade?” If what Naminé told him is right, and it feels right, the only person other than King Mickey that’s supposed to have one is unable to use it and the reason he’s here, fighting. This boy is supposed to be a Nobody, right? So how is it possible?
“Shut up!” The still-hooded boy says harshly, readying his blade for another attack.
2. Supermassive Black Hole - Muse
Ooh, baby, don't you know I suffer?
Ooh, baby, can you hear me moan?
You caught me under false pretences
How long before you let me go?
Ooh ooh ahh, you set my soul alight
I thought I was a fool for no one
But ooh, baby, I'm a fool for you
Oathkeeper changes pointedly into Oblivion and swings deftly one last time, for what the blond boy seems to expect to be the finishing blow, but in a wild, desperate motion – and if Riku was anyone but himself he really would be dead – he catches it by the shaft and tries to wrench it out of the other’s grasp.
The other boy doesn’t seem like he’s going to let go, though, and it appears to be a terrible miscalculation for a moment, before the boy pitches forwards and crashes into Riku, Keyblade dropped in surprise and vanishing from both of their grips. The force of the impact makes Riku’s covered turquoise eyes blink hard once, then open wider than he thought was possible as he stares into the bright coldness of the other boy’s equally shocked blue eyes inches from his own.
3. Another Word For Desperate - Straylight Run
And all the awkward ways
that you recoil
when I get close
And oh, the awful grin
that greets me when
I know I'm wrong
So down on hands and knees,
choking, gasping, dripping spit
I just can't make good
on any of these promises
Then he asked me,
"what does that mean?"
What's another word for desperate?
Repetition makes an impression
What's another word for desperate?
I won't be around here
for too very long
“Sora,” he says again, not caring that he’s also slammed against the shelf again, strangely thrilled to see the anger in those eyes flare up once more.
---
“You’re so pathetic, Riku.”
“What-” and that word really is said with a gasp, “-what’s that supposed to mean?” He’s not pathetic. He’s not.
---
“I can’t,” he protests, “that’s impossible.”
“Of course it isn’t,” Roxas scoffs, reaching to remove the blindfold himself. Riku attempts to twist away, but Roxas has made very sure not to let him be able to move. The other boy starts to press closer to him once more, fingers playing with the edges of the blindfold.
“Don’t let a monster out if you’re not prepared to fight it,” Riku warns, turning his head away, and he’s uncomfortable again, having this boy talking about his blindfold.
“Monster, Riku?” Roxas laughs, and not very pleasantly, either. “You’re just a lost little boy who doesn’t know what he wants.”
4. Just Tonight... - Jimmy Eat World
I was scared but once I thought about, I let it go
Everything she said to me I guess I ought to know
We're all tired talk when it comes to shove
Put up put out or stay at home
We'll never be the same
Never feel this way again
I'd give you everything but you want pain
A little water please
I taste you all over my teeth
Never again
Just tonight?
Okay.
All at once the music stopped
The feeling ran away
An ugly picture of me and you
But nothing I can change
You know what happens when the light's back on
The less you know the more you want
And you want
You want
“Masochist,” Roxas smirks triumphantly. Riku’s too busy panting and oh god-ing to really argue at this point, so he just settles for letting Roxas shove his tongue down his throat again.
---
“Sora,” he breathes into Roxas’s hair, in an almost-whisper like the first time he said it here, and as Roxas starts and pushes away from him, it’s still the wrong thing to say.
5. What Do You Need? - Goo Goo Dolls
What do you need from me tonight?
I feel you look right through me now
I can't pretend it's alright
Maybe we'll find a way somehow
Why do you need to turn it on?
Why does it always feel so wrong?
What do you need from me tonight?
The truth is so complicated now
You feel so free to say
You're wrong
Fear makes you fragile darling
Hate is so heavy when you're weak
Now we're both lost in anger
When we're alone we'll find some peace
“Is that really what you’ve been thinking this whole time?” Roxas demands, at once offended and furious.
“Wait, So-” He was going to say Sora again, damn his mouth, and Roxas’s eyes flashing tell him that the other boy knows it. Riku doesn’t even remember anything about what Sora’s like.
“Did you think that if you let me fuck you, that I’d suddenly turn into him?”
6. Stupid - Sarah McLachlan
Night, lift up the shades
Let in the the brilliant light of morning
But steady there now
For I am weak and starving for mercy
Sleep has left me alone
To carry the weight of unraveling where we went wrong
It's all I can do to hang on
To keep me from falling into old familiar shoes
How stupid could I be?
A simpleton could see
That you're no good for me
But you're the only one I see
Love has made me a fool
Set me on fire and watched as I floundered
Unable to speak
Except to cry out
And wait for your answer
But you come around in your time
Speaking of fabulous places
Create an oasis
Dries up as soon as you're gone
Like he really expected a Nobody – even Sora’s Nobody – to feel anything, to do anything different. So stupid.
7. Sweetness - Jimmy Eat World
String from your tether unwinds
Up and outward to bind
So tell me what do I need
When words lose their meaning
I was spinning free
With a little sweet and simple numbing me
Stumble till you crawl
Sinking into sweet uncertainty
What a dizzy dance
The sweetness will not be concerned with me
And Riku doesn’t really have a good reason for why he’s approaching Roxas like this, even after the Nobody made his opinion of Riku quite clear, but he just can’t seem to put the blond boy back into whatever mental box he started out in – not after what happened in the supermarket – even if he wanted to.
8. Casey - Darren Hayes
And we're all alone, and so tired of being underrated
So don't take me home 'cause I feel alive when you come and save me
A yellow car speeding down a south-side freeway
we'll rewrite this movie
make it end like we want it to
And Casey, when you go,
can you come and find me?
I wanna be beside you when you leave this town
I'll be waving goodbye
pretending not to cry
I wanna be someone
If you take me away, all the pain will change into a memory
of when we were amazing
1989, summer had hit but it was not moving
What is it with this town?
Every time we win, it just feels like losing
We were never gonna fit in
I was a mixed-up kid and you were my sanity
“Roxas,” he says, simply, and the violence is gone. A moment before, Roxas looked like he maybe wanted to fight him again, but now… Roxas is looking at him now like Riku’s real. With such an abrupt change in demeanor, Riku wonders how badly Roxas wants to be real, or if he thinks that Riku saying his name will make him more real.
9. Artificial Sweetner - No Doubt
Oh yes I'm guilty
For leasing myself out
Not ready to go up for sale
Can't seem to give it up
Stubborn, so selfish
I'm showing off the worst in me
I'm full of artificial sweetener
My heart's been deceitful
It's all artificial sweetener
I'm faking I love you's
You're forcing me to
You really deserve love
I want to love you
But I can't seem to find myself
“But I- that’s not,” there’s a gasp for breath, “possible, why would you-” Roxas cuts himself off, eyes wide and almost bewildered-looking. Then, quieter and a thousand times more anxious, “I don’t understand.”
10. Bullets - Augustana
Come fly down
Like a singing bird
Sings your name
I am still the same
Black and white
No, you're not to blame
Unless we
Put me down to shame
Lights in the car in the park
Falling on my face
I know who we are
I'm looking down for the rest of the night
Bullet in my head ended late last night
Jack and coke
Please take off your coat
Come and smile
Please stay here awhile
Almost immediately after they get inside, Roxas shoves him against the wall of the cubicle, and Riku pulls Roxas closer to him when the blond puts his tongue back in Riku’s mouth. They’d tried doing things more slowly last time, but it’s more comfortable for both of them like this.
11. Between - Vienna Teng
We are not together here
Though we lie entwined
To make room for the other presence
We both draw back in our minds
I have a prophecy
Threatening to spill into words
This growing certainty
Of Over
There once was a time I was sure of the bond
When my hands and my tongue and my thoughts were enough
We are the same but our lives move along
And the third one between
Replaces what once was love
Freedom is being alone
I fear liberation
But something more alive than silence swallows conversation
No pleasaing drama in subtle averted eyes
The swelling fermata as the chord dies<
“Next time is the last time,” Roxas says, Riku’s arms wrapped around him.
“Yeah,” Riku agrees. This delay, this… he doesn’t know what to call it – Riku can barely put Roxas into words anymore, let alone categories – can’t go on any longer. Sora’s waiting to be woken up.
12. Papa - Vanessa Carlton
Look up
look where you wanna be
look left
look where you left me
I shoulda known by the ice in his eyes
but you warmed me up with your 'so sweet' demise
and nestled in your calculated moonshine
boy you give good
love, plastic love
you're a genuine wannabe
and you got it all up your blue sleeve, your sleeve
Roxas falls to the ground. I didn’t want to, at first, but…
In a voice both foreign and far too familiar, “I’ve accepted it.” Riku’s won. It still feels like a betrayal.
13. Ain't That Unusual - Goo Goo Dolls
Could you talk to me
Honestly?
'Cause I never heard a word you said now
And I ain't just being mean
'Cause all we are is what we're told
And most of that's been lies
It's like a made for TV movie
And I just blew my lines
Someday you never made it
And maybe you never will
Hey, you never made it
Ain't that unusual
Now I feel unknown
And it's safe that way
Are you too bored to care
Or too dumb to be scared?
Now what's that supposed to mean?
I'm burnt out on some empty reasons
Another waste of time
There's something that I wish I'd said
But I don't think it'd rhyme
Sorry I put them words in your mouth
But you wouldn't talk to me
Everything I want, I haven't got
Sick of everything I'm not
Put my heavy coat on for a while
It's freezing in the corner of my mind
“You’re the one who’s losing right now,” The blond retorts, then stops abruptly and puts a hand to his mouth like he didn’t think it was possible for him to respond that way.
---
“Goodbye,” Riku says, smiling for a fraction of a second. I’m sorry, he wants to say, but the words get stuck in his throat.
---
And then, with a yell, the change begins. Distantly, Riku hears the metal sounds of Roxas’s Keyblades sliding past one another. Does Roxas even know what’s happening? Does he just not care?
---
DiZ is the one, he thinks, that doesn’t understand things. Bending down to lift the unconscious boy into his arms, deliberately restraining himself from brushing the hair away from Roxas’s face, Riku follows DiZ back to Twilight Town.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I'd be glad to hear what you guys think of this :)
